This is a blog post i was not sure weather to right or not, but decided in my own experiences to let people know and for others to share their experiences.
Online Dating has grown so much in the last 10 years, and in this blog post we will look into some of the so called free dating sites and weather it is worth wasting your time over, vs getting to know people in the real world.
I have never been a very confident person, so to me being able to chat to people about almost anything ask the touch of a keyboard is great.
I get to know the person, before well getting to know them in person so at least we have a common ground and things we wanted to talk about more when we do meet in person.
The first site i ever used which i would not really call a dating site but rather a place to talk to people, play online games etc.
This was a site Called Tagged as you can see by the image below.
Tagged was a great site because it had a rather addicting game called pets.
This was where you had some not really money to spend on buying people on tagged, and it was a competition of buying each others pets as they are called off each other.
It may be a sad concept, which there are many things in life that are so stupid and so simply that we end up still playing because its addicting.
Moving on i would look for people around 30 ish miles to get to know, and ended up finding a girl that become my Girlfriend for 5 years.
We chat for months, and decided to arrange a meet, so i have tagged for making it possible to find someone at the time.
We bonded a fair bit by using the silly game of pets, i remember us having a competition on buying the most people, and that whenever someone brought me or my girlfriend, we would keep trying to earn money so that we could buy each other again so we owned each other virtually lol.
It was in my opinion the best website around, despite the only minor fact that lots of forgein people kept messaging me and my girlfriend, asking to come over to England to meet and messages like, click here to help us etc which was clearly spam and contained viruses.
it was amazing how one website could bring someone Together that much.
Sadly I went back onto that site after taking a few years break, and having a break up with my ex to find that although the layout had not changed much, the spam and fake accounts only grew.
Not just that but the way people judged you via your profile and what you put onto it.
it has always been my rule for years that if you create a long profile explaining who you are and what you like no one will take the time to read it.
I also say as well that you can not even begin to understand or get to know that person via what you write on there, otherwise again your profile would be pages long.
so the best way to get to know people is via messages.
From the sort of messages i get i can say this is general thing across all sites.
You either get told sorry i do not want to get to know you because your not my type.
Hmm.. very vague answer !!
So you proceed to ask then just out of curiousness why i am not there type.
and the different answers you get make me laugh.
Oh your just not my type, me thinks how can you possible no that, when we have not gotten pass hi, only conclusion is they are judging me on the way i look.
another reply is I.. do not need to give you a answer i do as i wish.
Other replys are,i only get to know/date black people, racist much lol.
sorry you do not like this band i am into...really you wont talk to me because i may like a few different artists wow... (:
To even the classic ones as i am not judging you, my reply is of course yes you are, how about you get passed hi and get to know me before making that decision, which either then results in being blocked, a laughing reply of i would never date you, you ugly cunt, or this is why i do not talk to younger people because they have no manors.
I can understand that we all have a preference in some way to who we would like to get to know or even date, but 90 percent of opinions are made without even exchanging messages, which i think as a society that is really sad, for me i never ever judge on looks or age, personality counts, and the older you get the more you know that, i would rather be with someone who understands me etc, then weather be with what the society calls as a really hot looking women.
Anyway moving onto other sites, to a site called badoo, which is a another social site where you can message people and get to know them, with a limit to around 5 per day unless you pay for super powers, and other features like being in the top list where your profile gets seen more etc.
It is a free site to use and like with tagged is only a few now days that are free with the side options of add ons.
This site has a very mixed review, because on one hand i have made just online friends from it, and in other cases, comes back to the judging element again but not only that, badoo sending you emails saying so and so said hi, when they didn't its just badoo automated bots at work.
Creating fake accounts some with auto messages and some who send you 2 reply and then never speak to you again.
One of the clever methods i use to tell a fake from real is i say to them, take a picture with a sheet of paper saying my name face must be visible.
This way you know they are some account a guy has created, or the site has.
Again some of the replys you get are i am real, click this link to see me, like yeah course i am that stupid to (:
I have had accounts magically no longer exist after that message, and other stupid replys.
Now days 60 percent of customers on any site are fake accounts created by the company to lure people in.
so yeah badoo overall is a ok site, once you get past the fakes and the bull crap its nice to find those who you get along with, but be warned it takes a while to find those.
now days if you put into google free dating sites or social sites, even looking after page after page, you will often find that the word free is using very loosely.
Most sites will often have the same basic layout of sign up asking you if your male or female and so on.
you can 80 percent of the time tell if your wasting your time before even setting up a profile by looking in the corner of the websites for a upgrade button.
those buttons once clicked will often say oh if you want to reply to a message it will only cost you 80p a day making us sound so cheap and then when you add it up a month becomes very expensive.
its also funny how you have not given a pic and your profile says nothing about you but suddenly you have a email saying you have gotten, 5 winks, 10 messages, 20 profile views within less then a hour of signing up to this so called free site.
Back when sites like this first started ok it might have caught a few people into their money making trap but because so many websites do the same thing and cant even be bothered to create a unique website other then making the sign up page flashy, that people are not as stupid as there were and can tell a spam a mile off.
so when it comes to paid for sites i have always stayed away, until i was stupidly caught by the marking team of match.com and via a friend who said it was good.
I had a email saying you can get 6 months for the price of 3 which was 30 pounds, and i thought at that why not, i will give it a shot.
you first are given a very over the topped detailed pages you have to fill out about yourself,
which as the title of the website suggests its a way to help match you with people which i do not believe in that system.
Only once you have paid do you find out that your ok to send messages and even read and reply but to only those with a paid for membership. and that if you want anyone to message you back, you can pay a extra 10 pound a month to lol.
Like thanks for wanting more of my money.
So if a women looks at my profile and supposedly wants to get to know me they can not unless they paid.
I even tried to sneakily get around there stupid rules and often told them to message me on Facebook, if they wanted giving them my link, which is not the same as getting a link to a website which you never heard of lol.
I dont mind people knowing i am on these sites, because i am fully open and people should not laugh or judge with someone who pefers getting to know people online first (:
I got told off my match.com for breaking their rules and that if i carried on i would be removed which to a degree i understood but still such a stupid rule.
anyway the overall exploring off the site is great and its easy to message me.
I met one person though there, but after 10 different excuses after meeting why i was not there type i gave up on the person.
After spending months on the site i started to notice a pattern of people looking at my profile even having their own range match, mine but yet again i got the nasty usual replies as with most of the sites i had been on.
I also noticed a pattern of fake accounts, and that as soon as i canacl my membership i magically got loads of people wanting to talk to me hmm....???
oh and that was not the best part of match.com, i cant remember the name completey, but join us on our sister site, where is more tailored to finding your match for only another 10 pounds per month.
so ok I joined match.com paying for it and you also want me to pay to use your other site which is some how better?
Maybe when the website first started it was good but now days its just full of fake accounts and them asking you to pay even more money, oh but we do give you the free meets with real people events every now and then which are only ever in major cities like Manchester etc. so yeah thanks (:
So after spending so many days of my time, i gave up for a while and then decided to see if any apps on my Ipad were better.
Singles around me, was a app where is suggested people based on your location, which was never ever right, as you would talk to someone which said they were 10 miles away and they were from another country. or over 100 miles a way.
Lovoo was the worst at connecting with people who were mostly from india and other places even after filtering the options to just UK people.
I will not even mention Tinder since it has its only rep, and hundreds of videos on why not to use it.
Even Facebook has gotten that bad and smart and trying to put fake accounts on but way smarter.
Some days i can get up to 3 fake accounts trying to add me, it started with the usual stuff off, hey you looking for a guy for xxx and normally their picture would be of them nearly naked.
to have there location set to Grantham or nottingham and even looking close to a real person, until you see they have only just put a picture of themself up on that day and have posted nothing.
Online social media and even dating sites have gotten so bad now days that its impossible to even connect with people.
People like me who find it hard with social interaction to start with need to feel at ease and for me that is on via online sites but when you have so much corruption and sites saying there are free until you have signed up, its just becoming more effort then its worth.
Even though they may have been a lot of fake accounts i remember when i was 18 good old msn messager and even bearshare used to find music but also had a chat site.
Myspace turned from a social media platform to a serious music platform.
Another site which was so great back in the day, It was the site that got me into new music as a friend sent me a song of a old cd of Nickelback which now i love the band.
Facebook is impossible to make friends as if you send people messages they think your werdio because you do not know them, also people do not see them 90percent of the time because of the stupid oh here is a message but wait we will put it into this other inbox which we wont tell you have a message, and on mobiles you cant even access that section !!!!
Other sites people have talked about is plenty of fish which again costs, e harmony which is most like match.com
I feel sorry for the way the new generation of the internet is going.
And because i find it so hard to start up a convo in person, its all just costs for us.
Even places like meetup.com. which is to meet like minded people for a meal, pub quiz, etc costs money, to join and even then go for these events, which is never just you and one person its normally around 10+ people plus ):
I suppose i just one day have to snap out of my shell and talk to people, put me in business mode and i am super confident put me in a room of people having a meal or even meeting someone new and i am useless lol, until i know that person i find it hard to talk.
I could go on about these sites but i shall leave it there, if you have ever been on any of those sites or different ones please let me know if it was a scam etc (:
Thank you For reading
Hopefully this world will not get worse at judging a book by its cover,.... who i am kidding it will only get worse lol
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